Candy, Candy, Candy.

Yesterday was Devil's Night and so now I am basically screwed. There will be candy in my house and there isn't a damned thing I can do about it! All my recent efforts to get in shape after baby are headed down the drain.

Even if the candy we bought all gets given away, Elway will go trick-or-treating tonight, henceforth.. candy! And if you knew me at all you'd know there isn't a chance in hell he's going to be eating it. Yes, I will let him have a little chocolate, some chips, sure, but then I will lie to him and tell him it is all gone.

Sometimes we do lie for good reasons, us moms. It's not like I won't tell him the real reason why he can't have candy as well...

Here is what I tell my son about candy. I tell him that candy is made of the opposite of his gummy vitamins and can give him a headache, a tummy ache, sore teeth and throat. If he eats candy, then the vitamins don't work as well either, and he knows that vitamins help you grow big and strong. I say, "Mommy loves you! I don't want you to be unhealthy!" And then I tell him, it's just brightly colored to make you think it tastes good, but really, toys are more fun because the color doesn't turn your hands blue.

Yes. I deprive my kid of candy, but I get him the awesome gummy vitamins and toys!!

Well I will tell you, though it sounds harsh to make candy sound like poison, it works. Because every time Good Cop... I mean Jim (Daddy), gives him candy... Elway spits it out. Even chocolates don't really do it for him. He will enjoy Nana's super chocolaty homemade wacky cake, yes. But if I gave him a Mars bar, he'd eat one, maybe two, bites and then drop it.

By the way, it's likely also a little manipulative of me to talk about how the candy colors come off on your hands. Elway is not a fan of skin discoloration. Funny, I've never quite worded it that way before, but it about sums it up. Those play tattoos, make him cry. Seriously.  He is the neatest child with a paintbrush -EVER. If he gets his hands even slightly dirty, it's time to wash them off, and I don't say a thing. I am perhaps even a little remiss about him hand washing, but I've always figured that you have to get exposed to germs and dirt to be immune to them. I don't know where he gets it from??

Anyway, back to the point. Candy is coming here and my hips are waiting in anticipation. What am I supposed to do with the stuff? Throwing stuff out is very hard for me when it's worth something... it cost money right? So you shouldn't throw it out till it goes bad. Could I put it on Craigslist? Just kidding.

The truth is that once candy has infiltrated my home? My will power is rendered defenseless.This leaves me only one course of action and I have already put it in to motion.

 I skipped the workout this morning.

How is this going to help my butt from widening? Well, here is my thinking.

I am going to not workout for as long as it takes for the candy to be gone, so say a week, or 3 days, and then when I work out again, the workout will have a stronger effect because my body will be that much less used to it.

That's my cockamamie plan and I'm sticking to it. :)