An Elway Explanation

Today was a relatively decent day (said the mommy in her head, trying to drown out the 4 year old screaming that he "won't poo" from the washroom, and the 1 year old chanting, "Mama" and grappling at her knees -which ever so recently she found so adorable). Except for one part.

Earlier on, after a particularly enjoyable pretend picnic, I was folding some laundry outside while my son was reading and my daughter was wandering about teething on leftover pretend utensils, when suddenly the moment of serenity ended.

White gunk was on my baby girls bottom lip, and a sour expression combined with confusion was in her eyes.

After rushing over and wiping frantically, I knew before Elway helped me to uncover the truth that my princess just tasted bird poo.

Joy.

I of course shoved my finger in her mouth and tried to pull everything I could off of her tongue while running inside and finding a way to angle her head under the kitchen faucet to flush as much shit out of her grin as humanly possible. All the while, Elway explained away.

"Mommy it was not my fault!! A bird pooped on my book and Isla was standing there with the spoon. She gave it to me. She was sharing!!! It was great...cause I needed to clean the poop off my page. It was all white over the words and I couldn't understand what Geronimo was saying so I had to wipe it off. I just used the spoon, but I didn't tell her to eat it. She did that on her OWN!!!"

Overall, a relatively decent day. I'll just be standing post for signs of illness. Parasites. UGH.