Quotes From Elway's World - On Respect

In the morning I used to always have some quality time with my son when we would do puzzles, read books make Mr. Potato Heads..whatever. Since Isla came along, this sadly doesn't happen as much in the early morning any more. This morning was one of the few days, when she was already fed and back to sleep by the time Elway woke. So, naturally I wanted to play with Elway. He had other ideas.

He is doing a jerky robotic jig singing the Transformers theme song.

Elway: Momma, *p-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch* (He can't stop the rhythm long enough to ask me a question) Can I PLEASE watch *-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch* TRANSFORMERS?
Me: Well, I kind of thought since Islas asleep, we could do a puzzle or a game or read this pirate book?

Honestly, I am hoping for the book. Between him and Isla waking last night, and Jim and I hanging out til midnight, I don't even know what I slept.

Elway: I was thinking, no. I want to watch Transformers...more then meets the eye!!

Can't say I blame him. I mean it's an awesome show, and we have it on DVD, so he knows he's never missing the first 5 minutes. (I think he and I have a lot in common) But, I am upset. I want him to want to play with me. Any time, and every time I am busy, he gives me puppy dog eyes, a quivering lip (trademark baby Meredith move I'm told) and "but momma... I want to play with you". I hate guilt trips, mostly because they make me feel guilty. Yeah, I hate feeling guilty.

Me: Elway, mommy wants to play with you. I have time right now... how about we play with your tools?

Most regretted Christmas gift of all time: Power tools that "really make noise". As if the noise of him pretending to use them wasn't bad enough. Not to mention I constantly have to tell him not to hammer..uh..everything.

Elway: No mommy. The last time, Megatron said he'd be back to destroy the Autobots!! (You don't say...) I HAVE to watch this one!!
Me: We have it on disc, honey...
Elway: I asked very nicely Mommy. (He says this to me like I am the 3 year old.)
Me: Fine, Elway, you can watch a Transformers. But remember this the next time I can't play because I am busy. OK?

He is thinking.

Me: Well? Next time mommy is busy and you want me to play Lego, remember that we could have played this morning, but you just want to watch a show. So, mommy won't feel so bad, if I can't play Lego next time. OK??
Elway: No.
Me: What do you mean, 'No'? Yes. This is the way it is. OK?

This is verbatim.

Elway: No. Not OK. I want to watch Transformers, and later I want you to play Lego with me, and that's fair, because there is respect when it's Elway's World! Capiche? Capiche.

I am dumbfounded. This is difficult because, he is not trying to be rude, he just has his logic all figured out... and it's CRAZY. Crazy, self centered 3 year old logic. I have to remind myself he is 3.

Me: No. Not 'capiche', Elway! You don't tell Mommy what to do. You are not the boss. I am. You want to watch Transformers, and I am saying fine. But you could learn from this. Mommy wanted you to play with me, but you said no. So I am not forcing you to play. Forcing anyone to play isn't nice. It is bossy, and being bossy is no way to get respect.

He looks me in the eye.

Elway: It is in Mommy's World.

I cannot argue. I don't even know how, so I just nod  to agree and start to insert the DVD.

*Psoooow- Bow-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch! Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch--Transformers!*